Title: Unrequited
Part 6
Author: Lizzie
Rating: R
Content: Not a lot besides some very light m/m and a whole bunch of total silliness.
Disclaimer: Characters don't belong to me. They belong to WWF and Titan Sports. No copyright infringement intended.
__________________
With everything they's bee going through, Jay had had barely two
seconds together to dwell on his own problems. He liked it better
that way for the most part - the more he could get his mind away from
the fucked-up mess he called his life the better as far as he was
concerned. And he guessed he had a good reason for distraction in the
form of Jeff and his troubles. Surely what Jeff was going through was
far worse than anything Jay could be experiencing. He liked to remind
himself of that, for what little comfort it gace and for the mental
boost he needed to sit with and console Jeff whenever he needed it.
And he needed it often.
But as he stepped back into the room he heard the spray of the shower
and knew he finally had a little time alone. Maybe that was a good
thing - he'd be able to get his mind off of Jeff, the mysterious
reason Matt thought he'd told Vince, and his own feelings on Matt and
Jeff's relationship. That had to be a good thing. He was pretty sure
it was screwing with his head thinking about all that 24/7.
There was onyl one problem. The moment he knew he had a chance to
think his own thoughts, as soon as Matt and Jeff left his head,
suddenly all he could think of was Adam.
His mind wnaswered back over the day. He'd managed just over a week
without so much as being within ten metres of him, then wham, they'd
talked twice in the same day. If what they'd done really qualified as
talking, which, in terms of how they used to talk, it didn'. Adam had
been kinda weird around him, which he supposed was to be expected. He
couldn't honestly say he'd heard so many 'uh's leave Adam's mouth in
all the time he'd known him. It as like he'd been at a loss for
words, which almost never happened. So maybe he'd been nervous. He's
made Adam nervous. Well, that was a first.
Then again, he hadn't exactly made things easy on him. He'd been
cold, flat, had made absolutely no attempt at conversation. At the
time he'd just wanted to get away as quickly as humanly possible, and
he'd figured Adam idn't really want to converse with him anyway.
They'd been more fored together than anything and short of completely
blanking each other they'd had no choice but to talk. Not that Adam
had had all that much of a problem with blanking him before, but that
was beside the point...
He'd run away. He'd made an excuse and run away. What sort of an
impression would that give Adam? That he couldn't stand to be around
him? Well, that much was true at least. He wasn't sure he could stand
t see him, stand in the same room, talk with him, for more than a few
seconds because it brought it all back. Years of easy friendship.
Smiles, jokes, the best times of his life. And that night, hot
kisses, the look in Adam's eyes as he buried himself inside Jay,
bodies entwined 'til the morning. The aftermath. It was too painful.
He couldn't be around him and not feel his lips, hear him moaning his
name. It was impossible.
So he'd brushed him off and run away. Very mature. Way to face up to
your problems, Jay.
He lay down on the bed, kicking off his boots and resting his head
back on his hands. Between the two of them he and Adam were one hell
of a fucked up pair. Best friends, one in love with the other, the
other horrified at the very idea. Except he hadn't seemed that way
that night... It seemed like he wanted it, needed it, just as much as
Jay did. But that was the pasy. And judging by the conversation
they'd had the next morning, Jay guessed there'd been some sort of
dire miscommunication somewhere along the line. All he knew for sure
was Adam suddenly had a complete change of heart, and really Jay
should've known better in the first place.
THe shower stopped, and when he heard Jeff's soft sobbing he was
ashamed to find he was almost pleased for the distraction.
"Jeff, you okay in there?" he called.
"I'll be fine", came Jeff's choked, sniffling reply. Then he laughed.
Not his usual laugh, but sad, miserable. "Fine. Yeah, I'll be fine,
won't I".
Jay left the bed, pushed open the door and slipped into the bathroom.
Jeff was standing naked in the shwoer stall, his back turned, leaning
with his forehead pressed against the wall, dripping wet. Jay grabbed
a towel from the rail and tugged Jeff away from the wall, slipping
the towel around his waist, taking another and starting to dry his
shoulders. Jeff didn't even try to resist.
"I'm not gonna say you'll be fine", he told him, brushing the towel
over Jeff's collarbone, lifting his wet blue hair out of the
way. "You won't ever be fine. But it'll get better, easier. It will".
"I don't see how it can".
"Then you'll just have to trust me. It'll get easier, I promise".
"Like it has for you?"
Jay stuffed the towel into Jeff's hands and stepped back. "I'm only
trying to help, Jeff. You didn't need to say that", he said, shaking
his head.
"I know, Jay, I'm sorry, I'm just feeling really sorry for myself.
You're probably right. You're always right. It'll get easier, for
both of us. And 'til then we've got each other, right?"
"Yeah, we have. C'mon, dry off and come to bed. Maybe we'll wake up
in the morning and everything'll be fine again".
"I hope so".
***
Jay woke early from fitful sleep, Jeff's cheek pressed against his
chest, a small smile on his sleeping face. He could never quite
understand how he could sleep so peacefully with all that was going
on in his life. Jay hadn't managed a decent night in over a week. He
hwasn't even sure how Jeff managed to sleep through all the tossing
and turning, or how every morning like clockwork he'd wake up with
Jeff plastered to his body. It was completely beyond him.
He waited until Jeff had moved just enough then slipped out of bed.
He washed and dressed quickly, sneaking out of the room after writing
a note so Jeff wouldn't worry. Then he went down early to breakfast.
Except he changed his mind when he stepped into the dining room to
find Adam there. Sitting with Billy, deep in conversation. He made an
abrupt about-face and decided breakfast didn't seem like such a good
idea after all. Suddenly he wasn't all that hungry anymore.
The day passed slowly and uneventfully, alone. He mooched around the
city, wherever it was they were this week, picking up a couple of CDs
he'd been meaning to buy for months that he'd probably never find tme
to listen to and a shirt he thought might look good on Adam but that
he'd got in Jeff's size as an excuse to buy it. He stopped in at a
café and felt pathetic as hell sitting there alone eating a double
portion of something gooey and disgustingly unhealthy. He wound up in
some obscure comicbook store staring dumbly at a poster of himself
standing with Adam. Then finally he decided he'd had enough of
torturing himself wandering around aimlessly and started to wander
back to the hotel.
He got lost and it started to rain. It seemed like every single taxi
that went by was taken, nowhere was selling umbrellas and he'd left
his coat back in the room. So when he finally got back to the hotel
he dripped all the way through the lobby, left a small puddle of cold
rainwater in the elevator and was thoroughly miserable by the time he
realised he'd forgotten his keycard and couldn't get into the room.
Eventually Jeff opened the door. Beaming. Absolutely beaming.
"What's with you?" Jay asked, frowning and heading into the bathroom,
shrugging out of his wet clothes and tossing them into the bath. Jeff
followed him in with a set of dry clothes.
"Matt called", he said, perching on the edge of the bath, still
beaming.
"And...?"
"He talked to Vince".
"Are you gonna tell me what you're grinning about or am I gonna beat
it out of you with... this wet sock?"
"Matt talked to Vince. Well, Vince talked and Matt listened. He
apologised, said the person who'd told him about us had come back and
told him they'd made a mistake. According to Matt, Vince actually
blushed. He was *so* embarrassed. Matt made him feel like hell. He's
teaming us together again. We don't have to get separate rooms
anymore. We'll have to be extra careful, but its not like we weren't
anyway and... I can't believe it! Everything's working out!"
"Just like that?"
"Don't be such a cynic, Jay. Some things really do work out just like
that".
"Not often, though. Admit it".
"I know, but this is working out. And I know Matt's still gonna have
to pretend like he's with Amy but I guess it's worth it 'cause we get
to be together and could you look any less happy for me?"
"Sorry. I was just wondering why everything can't work out for me
like it has for you".
"I'm sorry. Really. It sucks. But I've gotta go. I'm meeting Matt and
we're going to dinner to celebrate. Maybe a club or something. Amy's
chaperoning. I'm not trying to be insensitive, honest, and you can
come if you want..."
"I think I'll just stay here and dry off".
"Okay. Look, I'll see you later". Jeff headed for the door.
"Seeya".
"Oh, and Matt said to tell you he spoke to Adam and Adam convinced
him you weren't the one who told Vince. Bye!"
The door slammed shut and Jay was left staring blankly at the spot
where Jeff had just been before he could even get out a word to
question. Adam? What the hell had Adam got to do with it? What the
hell was going on?